First off, in casual dining, there are children everywhere. Don't get me wrong; I like children. One day I hope to have a few. But I don't like waiting on children. They make a huge mess, they're picky, and their meals cost less than $5. At my old restaurant we had our share of children, but here in casual dining there are children at almost every table. No joke. You can't escape them. It's understandable, of course, but I don't have to like it.

The work dynamic is completely different here in casual dining. A typical couple at my old restaurant could easily have a bill of $50. A couple of drinks (or a bottle of wine), an appetizer, and two entrees. Our dinner menu only had a few entrees less than $10. Most were between 12-15, and a few were as expensive as $20. That is NOT an expensive menu, but in casual dining there are only a few items that cost more than $10. Almost everything is between $7.49 and $9.99. The casual dining clientele drink soda, not wine. They are just stopping in for a meal while shopping or because they didn't feel like cooking that night. A couple in casual dining has a bill of about $20. It drives me crazy! I still can't get used to it.

In a way, the low check average balances out, because the tables turn over much more quickly. In casual dining, the guests are in, they get their food quickly, they eat, and they get out. At my old restaurant, the guests came to there for a night out. They ate at a leisurely pace, talked, and more often than not, got coffee at the end of the meal to lengthen the evening. So after the initial service, guests at my old restaurant didn't require much. But their checks were larger so they tipped larger. In casual dining the checks are half as much, but the tables get up twice as quickly. That translates into more work for me for no more money. Well, more physical work, anyway. The customers in my old restaurant required more shmoozing. They were pickier, they expected more from their experience, and they asked a lot more questions. I'm not much of a people person, but I have to say, I prefer the shmoozing.

The thing that bugs me the most, however, about casual dining isn't the kids, it isn't the check averages, it isn't the tacky "atmosphere". No, the worst thing about casual dining is, without a doubt, the birthday song. You know the birthday song. You probably hate the birthday song as much as I do. But take solace, because, unlike me, you do not have to sing the birthday song.

99% of the time, the birthday girls and boys have no desire to be sung to by the staff of the particular restaurant in which they are dining. Personally, my friends and family know that it is unacceptable to allow servers to sing to me on my birthday. Because I hate having the spotlight thrust on me. Luckily, the people close to me respect my wishes, unlike the companions of my guests whose goal it is to embarrass the one celebrating the birthday. And for some reason, this form of embarassment has become a part of our everyday culture. People come to expect it. So out we march, singing and clapping and making a spectacle of ourselves. At my old restaurant, we put a candle in a piece of pie, placed it in front of the guest, and wished them happy birthday. That's it. Simple, non-embarrassing, and still with the free dessert. It seems that now I'm destined to sing and clap and embarrass, since that is the way of casual dining. But I won't like it. And I won't stop feeling bad for the grown person forced to have everyone in the restaurant turn and look at them.